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Entry #31
More emo BS
2/6/08 by TomFulp
The more time I spend working on CC, the less I can sleep. It started with changing my regular work day from 8 to 8 into 8 to 12... But after working all day Sunday, I came home and caught up on PMs, then felt guilty about going to bed with so much work left to do, so I went back to the office and worked straight through until Monday night. Today was 7am to 1:30am. It's always the same, I finally come home, lay in bed... Try to clear my head... Feel like I'm about to fall asleep, but then I don't. And then I can't. So I get back up and either go back to the office or sit here on my laptop trying to put some thoughts down for the next day.
And working on CC itself is kinda like trying to fall asleep. You have that moment where you think you're almost there, but then your mind starts racing with ideas and thoughts and you just can't stop it, and suddenly you're nowhere near being there. But it has to be like that because that's what will make it great. They call it scope creep, but we really do have the scope pretty well under control right now, we just gotta follow through with everything so we don't regret leaving anything out.
Making the console version of Alien Hominid felt like one of those "only do this once" projects. Not that the opportunity only comes once, but that for my own mental health, I should only do it once. But here I am. After 15 months of development on AH, we told ourselves our next game would be something more simple, but it just doesn't happen like that... The next game always has to be bigger and better than the last, or else your moving backwards. And CC will certainly be big, and much better.
As the development of Castle Crashers has stretched out over a few years, I've felt a growing sense of self-loathing. After Comic-Con I finally just accepted that I will derive little joy from life until this game is finished. And that's just the reality of how it's gonna be and that's why even right now I should be programming instead of writing this. On that note...
- 95 comments
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3/1/10
"The next game always has to be bigger and better than the last, or else your moving backwards."
*you're
8/15/09
same here man ive been awake 24/7 without sleeping
8/12/09
maybe this comment is so far away for anyone to notive but someone should make a newgrounds game version of CC.
8/11/09
hey, just always remember...
In a few more hours, The sun will rise!
4/19/08
that's deep
4/10/08
I thought there was another coder working on this with you? What the fuck has he been doing?
3/25/08
Keep up the good work! I really have my hopes for this one and i'll definately buy it to my x360 when it comes out.
3/17/08
I almost stopped by the newgrounds booth at comic-con but I was trapped in the crowd at the Maximum PC booth and didn't want to have one of those weird moments.
2/14/08
dud play some call of duty ;halo,and some other games settle down for a while
and play some games it helps dont think about sleeping when triing to sleep.
2/14/08
Maybe a sledgehammer will help u get some sleep or a long nice coma :D
2/12/08
Yo Tom can you explain some things in Pico's school like what was a gun doing in the jainitor's office, what was a pile of poop doing in the jainitor's office, whose locker was the one with the wed in it, and how come when you kill the ninja kid his head falls off??????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????
2/12/08
Hey Tom
I know this is a little off topic but how can I get a cool image like yours for my avatar?
Pete
2/12/08
this is a spam message. roflmao.
2/12/08
I hope you get some sleep sometime soon, Tom. I think sleeping could even help give you some more great ideas for Castle Crashers.
It seems like programming for a console game would be really difficult, especially more than one. You're amazing, Tom!
2/12/08
Hey Tom do you think with all your long work days that Castle Crashers will come out sooner? Oh yeah i just got my Blue Knight figurine in the mail. I love the little guy. It's probably the best collectable i have(even though its like the only one i have.)
2/11/08
heres a stupid quetion what is cc
2/11/08
i just wonder how one day..it just hit you..i wanna kno how this all came to ur mind..if u can plz rely..howd u come up with pico nd alien hominid?
2/11/08
hey tom when is the chat room gonna be up?
2/11/08
After you finish this game, you should retire and live off your NG money and game royalties for the sake of your health. sanity, and interpersonal relationships. ;)
2/11/08
don't push yourself dude, castle crashers can wait a little while, your health is whats important
2/11/08
dude, dont worry , i know how you feel, your work will pay off though if you keep working just like you are ok man? keep up ALL the amazing work
2/10/08
Have heart man, we (or at least i) are all behind you.
P.S. Next time, maybe hire more code monkeys to spread the work load out... COUGH*ME*COUGH
2/10/08
You're so close.
2/10/08
Bless your cotton socks Mister Tom sir.
I wannt an xb0x :"(
2/10/08
But just think of all the sex you'll get from it.
"MY GOD IS THAT THE GUY WHO MADE CASTLE CRASHERS?... TAKE ME NOW YOU STALLION"
Then all the ladies will rip their clothes off...
I'm sure it's like that being the owner of Newgrounds alone.
2/10/08
eeeey, relax, have sum fun for a bit, then get back at it when your ready, start not giving a shit for a while then get back to it. you deserve it :)
2/10/08
I can never really say I've ever been in a situation like yours, but damn, you're over working yourself.
For me, I'm either going to college, doing my homework, or working to pay to go to college. Right now, life isn't what I hoped, but there's always light at the end of the tunnel. I hope that once I finish college, I'll continue my education to major in graphic design (after my microcomputer degree), but right now, I just gotta work a lil harder to get it so I can have a higher paying job to pay for my next college.
I don't know you and you don't know me, but I thought I'd say that in a sad attempt to try and cheer you up. You've got our backing. Good luck!
2/10/08
Can't fucking wait to play this. All my Microsoft Points are belong to you.
2/10/08
come on tom im emo :( u make me feel bad man
2/9/08
u r working too hard take a brake 4 the people of newgrounds if not 4 your mental and physical health please
2/9/08
Oh no
2/9/08
As the spokeshead and birthmother of newgrounds, would you be able to take time off , for yourself ?
2/9/08
i live philly once but i moved it kinda sucked cuz ilived in a basment....too many cockroaches
2/9/08
You guys should clearly hire a few more people to help with the work load of CC if the development is impacting your daily life this much.
2/9/08
damn.
maybe you should take a break from CC for a while.
you sound REALLY stressed out!
2/9/08
Poor Tom... you should take a break from programming CC.
2/8/08
I am so happy that I'm a teen with no pressure..... oh wait, my girl problems, DAMMIT!!
2/8/08
wow, castle crashers is gonna be good if you're spending this much time on it!
2/8/08
Someone need some happy pills?
Cheer up pal.
2/8/08
So who exactly are you making this with, and who's doing the art?
2/8/08
CC sounds like it's going along great. Don't forget the Madness though...
2/8/08
Sometimes you just need to look in the mirror and say, "I'm Tom goddamn Fulp."
2/8/08
have you heard of "karoshi"?
i don't know if this is true but it is the japanese word for death by over work
just take care of yourself man
2/8/08
I've heard aboutthe way these overworked "lack of sleep" stories end. Just don't go pulling a Heath Ledger on us.
2/7/08
Its just that demon life's got you in its sway.
2/7/08
It will all be worth it when it's over. Start saving up some vacation money for you and the Mrs.
:-)
2/7/08
the only thing that will help tom at the moment is...... CAFFIENE!
lol
2/7/08
Its alright Tom. We all appreciate the hard work you do for this site. And I can't wait for Castle Crashers, so if you want to work on it 24/7, well that's ok. I'm not gonna stop you. But you really should get some sleep.
2/7/08
You can only put your happiness aside for so long, You've accomplished so much you should take the time to take in everything. good luck with your endeavors.
2/7/08
Your gonna be richer so it doesn't matter. APRIL WANTS HER NEW YORKIE DAMNT