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Entry #141

FBI Investigation

2012-10-02 10:31:11 by TomFulp

From: via
Subject: You have been reported!

Dear NewGrounds

We got a report on you. The FBI has to investigate this.

If it ends up being crime you can get from 5 to 20 years in prison. Because of this, we need more information about you so we can investigate further.

We are going to ask you for some infotmation later on in this email. You'll need to reply with all the information needed and it must be accurate and valid. After this we will contact you again with information on this case.

WARNING: If you do not reply within 72 hours, we will send special forces to get the needed info from you.

We need all the information below:

Title. First name. Middle name. Last name. Telephone number. Company (your name if none). Street address. Country. City. State, region or province. Zip/postial code. Name of the bank you use. Telephone of the bank you use. Current balance on bank account. Credit or debit card from bank provided. Name as shown on card. Card number. Expiration month. Expiration year. Security code from back of card.

Copy the needed information list and write your information next to everything. Reply to this email with it.

NOTE: If you do not have a credit or debit card, go to your bank and get one.

Know that your information will be safe in the FBI directories.

The Federal Bureau of Investigation


I dunno guys, I mean this SOUNDS legit right? And all my info will be safe in the FBI directories so it should be fine to send them all that info.


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2012-10-02 10:36:41

Hahahahahaha Is totally LEGIT
now seriusly, that kind of scam is really common, if the real FBI reported you they will send a agent to your office to tell you the report and stuff


2012-10-02 10:36:47

Do it before they bust down your door man, you're running out of time!


2012-10-02 10:39:41

The FBI finally picks up modern technology. They email you before you get busted. Better put on one of those glasses with nose and stache attached. :>


2012-10-02 10:40:57

They had me at "NewGrounds"


2012-10-02 10:42:33

Totally the FBI there man, better not mess with those Big men out there better just give all of your Information out in a pretty E-mail because holy shit we don't wanna deal with em


2012-10-02 10:47:36

Cool. Newgrounds is edgy again.


2012-10-02 11:09:41

hahaha "go to your bank and get one."

TomFulp responds:

When I read that line I picture Woody from Toy Story talking about moving buddies, "If you don't have one, GET ONE!"


2012-10-02 11:21:18

fuck da fbi


2012-10-02 11:21:18

haha nice try


2012-10-02 11:21:29

DO IT. Nobody wants the "special forces" coming to get your info.


2012-10-02 11:37:36

das soooo legit man. You beetter give em' all dat intel.


2012-10-02 11:39:39

Fake and gay. Nice try, scammers.

What they don't know is that Tom is secretly an undercover agent for the CIA and has a license to kill scam artists with impunity. Sucks to be them.


2012-10-02 11:43:35

I reported you! Sorry but I had too :'(


2012-10-02 11:44:25

At first, I though it was serious. And then...........


2012-10-02 11:47:10

Hehe, you've been reported. And why? Some people fail at failing, seriously.


2012-10-02 11:51:26

'Dear Newgrounds, we need your first and last name, since we as the Federal Bureau of Investigation don't already have this information about you..."

Sounds legit.


2012-10-02 11:54:18

YEah... A FBI Report letter with a typo... It sounds SOOO Legit...


2012-10-02 12:02:23

Tell them you are suspicious of a mole at NG (hence the trouble with the FBI) and you don't trust the e-mail or phones. Have him do something wacky, like send a picture of himself holding a cat by the tail to prove he is who he says he is and only agree to give him the info in person after he does this.

If he's dumb enough to agree to that, call Philly's finest and have a pizza party with him.


2012-10-02 12:04:16

Abort mission man! Don't send me the P-Bots with the Bitey Snow, let's wait until everything cools down.


2012-10-02 12:09:23

Lol sadly, this probably worked on a number of people.


2012-10-02 12:16:51

OMG! So scared!


2012-10-02 12:17:41

Really, scared!


2012-10-02 12:27:55

Hahah, Dear Newgrounds, if you don't give our special forces free copies of Castle Crashers, we will storm HQ and kick your butts!

I mean, they might as well have said that, not going to get any more rediculous:}


2012-10-02 12:29:49

In response to starwarsjunkie:

There's a reason why they're called "special" forces.


2012-10-02 12:32:52

First off, they spelled "information" as "infotmation". Failure to proof read is already an obvious indicator.

Secondly, the FBI wouldn't need to ask you this information. They can either attain it from public records, or just ask you in for questioning.

Thirdly, the FBI never shares details on an ongoing investigation. They would never say "We got a report on you", or state "FBI" first without explaining the acronym. This is a horrible official letter, and there's not even a seal. Something like this would come signed anyways.

Whoever sent this is clearly an idiot and didn't do their research.

My suggestion? Trap them. Send them your name and stuff, because they can probably confirm that, but give them crap details and alert the officials.


2012-10-02 12:37:04

I think he's 13.


2012-10-02 12:49:38

That didn't really look imposing enough for the actual feds.


2012-10-02 12:54:38

Telephone of the bank I use?

What? The number or...? What, you want a picture of it?

These FBI guys can be right morons sometimes.


2012-10-02 12:56:40

"NOTE: If you do not have a credit or debit card, go to your bank and get one you cheap asshole."

Because Newgrounds' whole income is probably hidden under your bed Tom.


2012-10-02 13:05:34

thought the fbi had everyone s info ... why would they need to ask what they already know ?


2012-10-02 13:12:18

R.i.p. Tom's anal cherry.
(Because prison rape)


2012-10-02 13:16:23

You should call the FBI and ask them about this E-Mail. If this isn't legit then you might have come across something that they would want to know about.


2012-10-02 13:16:48

the true FBI would had found you already, they can check your IP address and localize your position easily, also, there is not listed any crime that you have probably not done, also, again, why the fuck would FBI asks your debit card infos? I mean, it's just a spambot that is tricking you into giving it your (and newgrounds') money.


2012-10-02 13:18:28

No shit, sherlock. xD


2012-10-02 13:44:43

As legit as that N****rian prince who wants to share his fortune with everyone.


2012-10-02 13:58:15

I (once again) get the impression that all US officials are nuts.
"We will send special forces." Could have been from a totalitarian regime as well.
"If you don't have a credit card, get one." I would feel fooled at that point.
"If it ends up being crime..." WHAT SORT OF CRIME? THEY DON'T EVEN TELL! FU-


2012-10-02 14:00:28

Oh noes!! Special forces are koming!!! D: Tom do zomethings!!


2012-10-02 14:16:31

Haha lol no. I have to say, out of all the things iv'e seen today, this just put a smile on my face.


2012-10-02 14:48:01

The law is comming to put you down Tom! You dirty filthy criminal scum! Surrender your postial kode and and cra[pit careds or u end up liek osamaas ban laydin.

-presadant of untitled states


2012-10-02 15:05:13

I lolled.


2012-10-02 15:06:32



2012-10-02 15:09:52


N***a, please.


2012-10-02 15:33:01

I don't know Tom, it could be a little shittick trying to take over the indie site of all indie sites, or it could be real. Either way, you've got some thinking to do. Best of luck Tom, if it's a kid, shove your foot up his ass.


2012-10-02 15:34:01

There's alot of spelling mistakes so it could be a kid, but that might be you (it better not be your spelling mistakes)


2012-10-02 15:44:28

It is a joke(?


2012-10-02 16:01:05

I call bullshit.


2012-10-02 16:02:40

E-mail them back with one sentence: "You'll never take me alive."


2012-10-02 16:03:22

Hand out false information and see what happens? ;D


2012-10-02 16:04:12

lmfao, seems legit


2012-10-02 16:05:49

Should'nt they have explained what you did first?

Actually I did some research there is a hoax coming around